8 Things That SUCKED About the Watchmen

i should preempt this by saying that I SNUCK into the Watchmen, and I wish I could take it back. I know what you're thinking, too much film snobbery, but this is the most conservative right wing comic book adaptation i've ever seen. I don't care how true to the graphic novel it's supposed to be, it's 2009, it's not cool to present such a problematic film. So the list.

1) The sound track. Leonard Cohen for a raunchy less than romantic sex scene? Really? I feel the soundtrack was basically somebody's ipod left on shuffle.
2) Okay, "Pink Triangle" company being evil. The gay characters are either villains or are killed. What a positive representation. Also, thanks for saying "indecent life style" when talking about lesbians. Don't try to argue Rorschach meant it in a good way, because he was going on a rant about how awful and morally corrupt the city was becoming.
3) Too much blue penis. We see it, it's there, but seriously the au naturale thing is no fun on the big screen. Yeah, i don't like penis in general but this was too much.
4) Malin Akerman sounds like Drew Barrymore, and nobody likes her voice. She also looks like every other Hollywood starlet, but not in a good way.
5) The really cheesy sex scene, what is this 300? (edit: Oh man Zack Snyder directed that too...)
6) The script was trying too hard to sound film-noir-esq but came off as an excerpt from a 15 year old emo kid's diary.
7) At first I like the slow motion effect, but it got to be way too much. The effect was like watching my grandmother attempt to open a jar. You just want to take from her and do it yourself, but you can't.
8) I probably would have paid NOT to see it.